Day One: Something You Hate About Yourself

Hate.
Such a strong word that I seldom use it.
There are a few things that I dislike about myself, some of which I truly have no control over- like, the fact that I will never have a beautiful smile.  Or, that my heart rules all my actions. There are other things that I can control, but allow myself to surrender to defeat.  You know, being on the giving end of a relationship, always working harder than most for the least recognition, eating more than I should/exercising way less.  You get the point.  In most recent years I have been trying my hardest to learn to love myself truly, flaws included. In that process, I have also learned that the part of me that I dislike (hate) the most is the part of me that really needs love the most-my self-esteem.

I probably have the worst self esteem of anyone you know.  And, because of that, people that I love suffer.
My Low Self-Esteem speaks to the jealousy and encourages it.  Low Self -Esteem speaks to envy and blinds me from all the wonderful things in my life.
Low Self-Esteem makes me see things that are not real.
Low Self- Esteem tricks my heart and clouds my mind.
Even still, little by little, I am learning to feed love to the one thing I hate the most in hopes that one day it will shed its ugly lining and blossom into the most beautiful entity it is destined to become.